When the disclaimer is the only part that fits

I hate lists about anxiety /mental health. There are lists saying if you have all or some of these _ _ _  you have ‘this’. There are lists saying if you do ‘this’ you’ll fix that. Those lists are particularly unhelpful.

But the lists that bother me the most are the ones that have that tiny sentence somewhere saying ‘don’t worry not everyone fits this list’.  LIKE THAT MAKES IT BETTER? I don’t feel like I fit in when I’m with people so not fitting your list is “ok”? I know I’m unique but it stings when you have catchy titles that claim you’ll understand what it’s like for me… when you have lists to tell me that I’m not alone. …. But I don’t fit your lists. I don’t relate to what they’ve experienced. BUT it’s ok not everyone fits this list. BUT it’s ok you can still have anxiety problems if you don’t relate.

I get caught up in lists that offer help because I use lists to help me cope with the swirling noise of “what ifs” that surround me.

But those lists offering ‘answers’ just add to the noise in my head.


What do I do when I know I’m anxious about everything but I don’t fit into your list or look like the examples you’ve researched?

I’ll tell you what. I decide what is important enough. Then I take a deep breath. Make a few plans and get on with it. I don’t need to fit into your lists to get on with ‘stuff’.

Stop with the trendy flashy headlines. I really should stop reading them. They’re like that car crash on the highway, except I’m not looking at the crash… I’m looking at the first responders…hoping I’ll see how to feel better more often.

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